Life is going pretty well. At least I have nothing really to complain about. School is off to a good start, the weather is very cold, but tolerable (no more snowstorms at least) and overall I feel like life is going the direction I want it to go. Prayer, meditation and setting goals for myself have really calm anxieties and bring about more internal peace. I don’t think it’s so much that the world around me has changed, but more I’ve changed how I perceive the world and how I deal with issues facing me in the world. And in doing so, I attract what I need out of life and push away what I don’t need. It’s a good feeling of quiet confidence that drives me now. I woke up to the rising sun this morning, quietly in my mind gave my morning prayer to God and Goddess, got up and felt prepared to take on the day. Homework, lunch, work, dinner, more studies…I can handle that. It helps now that I have a part-time job related to my career field that I feel good about going to everyday now (a prayer answered). The otherwise mundane life now feels, less mundane and more exciting. I mean, what’s more exciting than realizing that you’re on planet Earth, you’re living, you’re participating in civilization and can make something of yourself? I never forget how blessed I am to live where I live and have the opportunities that I have. Although, I would hope no matter where I could’ve been born and ended up, I could somehow contribute something positive to myself and others.
I thought I’d share this video with you guys. I really like this chica…she’s a model who’s also Pagan and lives in Britain. She does lots of Youtube videos, including videos on Witchcraft, Wicca and Paganism. Plus, she’s just damn charming. In this video, she talks about spiritual slumps which is very fascinating.
I’ve always had a fair amount in common with Paganism since high school (polytheism, recognition of seasonal and lunar cycles, the oneness of deity and nature). Although, I still have some connections with Christianity (celebration of Christmas and Easter, the influence of Christian thinking via family and the Bible…granted, I haven’t read much of the Bible in years). At the end of the day, I don’t really give myself an identifier, although I’m probably much closer to some type of eclectic Paganism than Christianity.
(Alert: Includes mature content of a sexual nature. Reader discretion is advised)
Last night, I made love with CT for the first time in 5 days. We hadn’t done so because she, like so many people lately was unfortunate enough to catch the nasty flu bug which was been going strong this year. It was so bad, we actually slept in separate rooms so as to avoid my exposure to it (we’ll see if I still catch it lol). But last night, she was feeling up to it, so we decided to make love. CT likes to tell me that it feels just a little different every time, but it felt quite different to me last night. There was an extra rush of energy, an extra need and desire for closeness, just something extra which I think came from the fact that (for us anyways) a lot of time had passed between sexual encounters. Of course, I felt completely merged and one with her at the height of the experience and that’s when I realized how much I’d missed her in that way. I’ll always be amazed by the powerful energy and spiritual connection sex brings with it. Makes me appreciate it as a true expression of love. I’ve had sex just for the sake of pleasure before and while it was physically enjoyable, emotionally and spiritually, the contrast is like night vs. day in terms of satisfaction. In fact, I always like I was missing something. Nowadays, I don’t think I could ever go back to having sex that way after having experienced sex as a spiritual act of love. It’s the act of God and Goddess becoming one, the act which conceived the Universe. It’s beautiful and so much more satisfying when not just body, but the mind and spirit are a part of it as well.